My real post was my wonderings about when our marriage shifted from caring about each other as individuals and caring what the other person cared about. To caring more about what needs to get done and why doesn't the other person care about what I care about.. or care about me?
I was pondering this very question late the other night while crying on the couch feeling broken and tired. We had 6 kids in the house and I just felt like I wasn't doing a good job of anything. I think the real root was that I wanted someone, anyone to tell me I was doing ok. That I was doing this for a bigger purpose. That I would someday be rewarded for my sleepless nights,sore back, and extreme mental fatigue!
I wanted Mr. Husband to bring me flowers and tell me how beautiful I looked even when I wasn't, shine a little romance light my way, I wanted to feel well... cared for. I was caring for the needs of so many others this week I wanted someone to care for me.
I was soaking in my very own pity pool.
I decided I had better get praying about this sad situation I found myself in.
While I was praying, I realized that my husband was a caring individual that in his own ways had put in as much and more time and energy than I had this week. Why didn't I see that before? Why didn't I care about my husband as an individual? Why wasn't I dong the very same for him that I wanted from him?
This coupled with the message from church today has me humbled and open to change.
Only possible through the work of the Holy Spirit
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