He is a nice guy. I am sure we never would have gotten married had I not hoodwinked him :)
So why is it that society believes that nice guys finish last? and in reality why do they?
I won't repost what the urban dictionary teaches about the phrase nice guys finish last, but I have found that this from wikipedia, The phrase is based on a quote by baseball manager Leo Durocher in 1946, which was then condensed by journalists.[14][15] The original quote by Durocher was “The nice guys are all over there, in seventh place.” (1946 July 6),[16][14] about the 1946 New York Giants – seventh place was last place in the National League.
Interesting.
Pshcology today teaches that nice people "need to be selective with your time, attention, and niceness. It means you cannot be eager to please, needy, overly-available, or endlessly nice. To create a loving, respectful, and appreciative relationship, you have to know the rules of the game...and play by them.
So, learn from the jerks and divas—but don't emulate them completely. Simply get your partners to invest in you back, as you invest in them. Further, only reward them when they deserve it and ignore them when they don't. Also, make them accommodate you too and don't let your life revolve around them. This will show them that you are a valuable and attractive person with some self-respect. Then, you can still be a decent person and find love...without being so nice others walk all over you."
So.
As we teach our boys to be respectful and open doors and have manners. we also need to teach them to have their own boundaries about sharing these qualities, and vice versa for our daughter. A balance between being honest about what they need and want while still serving and being a gentleman. I am sure the Bible teaches something about this somewhere ( I mean it has a who book dedicated to to the prevention of spreading disease! it must have something about how to not be a door mat) Maybe it's in Proverbs or Ecclesiastes. If you find it let me know!
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